Tuesday, August 22, 2006

Apparently being single IS a crime

I've been referred to a high-muckety muck fertility clinic to see what can be done about my poor tubes.  So, I call up and talk to Nurse Ratchett for 10 minutes, since once I said the words, "I want to make an appointment," I apparently was only then required to answer her questions.  I wondered when I'd get a chance to ask questions, and I finally caught a break.  When she asked if my insurance were my own or my spouse's, I jumped in with both feet.
 
"Actually, that's something I need to ask you," I said, probably sounding desperate.  Which I was, since it was the first thing I'd been able to say in ages that wasn't rattling off numbers.  "Do Dr. K and Dr. K treat single women?  I don't mean just treating; I am single and want to be a mother."  Since by this point she knew the basics of my problems, there was no doubt of exactly what I was asking.
 
"Ahh," she answered cautiously, and oh-so-intelligently.  "Well, they will see single women and work on diagnosis.  If there are problems, they will perform necessary surgery to correct them.  But, any fertility drug therapy, insemination, or IVF treatments are reserved for married couples."
 
BUZZ!  Wrong answer, nursie.  But of course, I went ahead and made the appointment; if nothing else, I can always cancel it, and if I decide to keep it, I won't have to wait another 30-60 days to see them.  I really have a feeling I'm going to cancel the appointment, even though it will pretty much leave me stuck between a rock and a hard place.  Drs. K&K are the only fucking reproductive endocrinologists/infertility doctors in the whole city who are covered under my insurance.
 
I just don't understand why it's such a pain to find a doctor to treat me as a SMC (single mother by choice) wanna-be.  It's not the first time I've run into this problem; both my family doctor and my ob-gyn have said that they wouldn't be "comfortable" helping me achieve pregnancy because I am single.  My ob-gyn even said that, were I to come in pregnant and single, it wouldn't be a problem.  But to actually help me get knocked up?  Oh no!  She even said that to even consider treating me, she would insist that I undergo counseling first.  And even then it wouldn't be a certain thing.
 
Apparently, a stupid teenager who gets pregnant is deserving of more respect and assistance than I am.  It doesn't matter that I'm 36, well-educated, employed, and stable.  Nope, no way; unless I have a ring on my finger and a M.R.S. degree, I am violating the natural order of the universe and must be stopped at all costs.
 
Sometimes living in the Bible Belt really sucks.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Hypocrites!

What if you bring your lebian partner or your common-law husband? Do you have to 'prove' you are married?

Christy